Right, So the final instalment of The Real Housewives of Melbourne Reunion kicks off with Lydia trying to comfort Pettifleur after she stormed off set during last week’s show.
Jackie fills host, Alex Perry (AP), in on what really happened (apparently Pettifleur accused Gina of not being a barrister) while Pettifleur is backstage insisting that everyone is lying about what happened.
AP tries to save the day while the other housewives stay put on the couches and chat amongst themselves (“she was plastered” “She was a pain in the arse”)
Pettifleur joins the group and Jackie launches straight into an attack, telling PF, “I don’t want you to feel upset but I don’t appreciate your saying that I’m lying.” (PF’s annoyed because all the housewives said she was drunk when in fact she doesn’t drink. You can catch up on it all in this recap)
Janet and Jackie acuse PF of lying about not drinking while AP jumps in with, “Can everybody SHUT UP for a minute” which, if you ask me, was probably the most sensible thing said all reunion!
Gina pipes up with, “She doesn’t mind going commando but she’s embarrassed about being drunk.”
PF insists she only every drinks “two glasses max”
Janet calls bullshit on that statement and AP insists they need to “shut this down” before trying to get to the bottom of it by “getting back to where this started.”
AP then takes on the role of mediator/quiz master and asks, “Gina did you call her the C word?” (yes, she did) and was there “any nail gauging?” (yes there was) so that was lovely and not at all embarrassing to watch.
There was then a package featuring all the housewives taking turns at picking on PF’s accent and heritage, which was both cringe worthy and pretty much highlighted how acceptable casual racism with a side serve of ignorance is here in Australia.
AP quizzed PF about her background with PF telling him, “it feels awful” when people tease her about her accent.
Gina insists that teasing someone about their accent isn’t racism, while Lydia and Chyka think it’s quite “condescending.”
We then change pace and watch a recap of Jackie’s psychic vibes before watching a recap of all the rather charming phrases the housewives like to use. This was finished off with a delightful montage of Gina adjusting her boobs:
Next up we see Rick (aka Wolf Pup) join the housewives on the couch. There’s a recap of his scenes with Ganble and a bit of a Q&A with AP where Gamble reveals that their wedding will be in September and will probably be filmed in Season 3 #cantwait
We then revisit “Rumour Gate” as AP likes to call it and there’s quite a lengthy discussion about THOSE rumours and how Janet was implicated. (You can read all about the rumours and how the whole thing started in this recap.)
Janet thinks it dragged on for so long because “somebody could’ve come in 2 second and completely stopped the pain that I went through for the whole season over this” before revealing that “one of the girls in this group” let Janet take the heat for the rumour. OOOOH AAAAAH. Who was that girl, I hear you ask?
Well I can confirm that it was in fact Lydia! I KNOW. Good old Lyds who likes to dine on the SEVENTY ONETH floor was actually the one who kicked off the rumour about Gamble enjoying sexy time en masse at pool parties. Who knew she was such a sneaky thing?! Not me, that’s for sure.
Janet was upset that her “credibility was bought into question” during the whole Rumour Gate saga but Gamble calms her down by saying, “I didn’t question it. I always knew you were full of shit!” #greatcomeback
AP then brings random guest housewife, Manuela, on set which creates quite the diva moment as Lydia refuses to move from her spot on the couch. (“I’m not going to sit on the end.”)
A quick game of musical chairs ensued and Gina solved the couch crisis by getting up and moving to the end. And here’s me thinking Gina wasn’t a team player!
Manuela and Gamble go at it for a bit, with all sorts of vile statements being thrown around (“you’re a piece of shit” is just one classy example) before it ends with Gamble making quite a revolting remark about baby cats which I won’t be repeating on this blog anytime soon!
There’s then a bit of a focus on Gina which results in Janet and Gina getting stuck into each other (again) before we listen to Gina defend her actions and refuse to apologise for basically everything and anything offensive she’s said during Season 2 of The Real Housewives of Melbourne.
As a result, Janet slides of the couch while yelling, “For Christs Sake. Just apologise and shut up!”
AP starts to wrap things up by asking the housewives what they’ve learnt from this season (Janet had “some major bad hair” while Gina now knows that her “humour can sometimes get me into trouble”)
PF tells AP she “would like to be able to call everyone her friend” while Gamble loves that she works with all the housewives.
There’s then some unseen footage of the gals running in their high heels while carrying a glass of champers (excellent multitasking)
before the show comes to an end and this little chestnut is aired:
I don’t know about you, but I’d say it’s a bloody tough call!
And that my Real Housewife of Melbourne loving friends is Season 2 well and truly over.
What did we think of it? Will you be watching The Real Housewives Of Melbourne Season 3?
And more importantly, will I see you back here next Monday now that the recaps are done and dusted?!
Huge thanks to ARENA TV for sending me advanced copies of The Real Housewives Of Melbourne, Season 2, each week to recap. It’s been a lot of fun!
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