Last week I took myself off for a bike ride. I’d had a particularly stressful couple of days and decided a good old fashioned bike ride in the sunshine and fresh air would be just the thing to clear my head and maybe even catch some of those endorphins that fitness freaks bang on about.
You can read all about how Mabel came into my life in the post Birthdays and Bike Rides.
While I was on my bike ride I thought about absolutely nothing (not as easy as it sounds!) and made sure I took in the view that changed with each corner turned.
When I got to the spot that I like to call One Tree Hill, I took a photo and Instagrammed it because everybody knows that if you don’t take a photo of your daily weekly exercise routine, it didn’t actually happen!
After taking the photo I thought to myself that it truly was a beautiful day and set off on my return route home.
I crossed over a couple of foot bridges, wound my way through the various bike tracks all the while taking in the chirping birds and the sweet sound of not much else.
And then, when I was not half a kilometre from reaching home, something caught the corner of my eye. It was lying on the path in front of me, long, green and very skinny.
I slowed down slightly, thinking it might’ve been a stick of some sort, but then it hit me. HOLY SHIT. STICKS AREN’T GREEN! THAT’S A SNAKE!!
I had no choice but to cycle past it, so I peddled faster than a doped up Lance Armstrong and whizzed past that snake so damn fast I gave myself a cramp in the left leg!
As I peddled past the snake, it decided to get up and hiss at me, which was quite possibly the most stressful thing that has happened to me in quite some time.
With my heart thumping and my legs working harder than they ever have before, I made it home, where of course I poured myself a soothing vodka googled what sort of snake it was.
According to the Snake Catchers website it was nothing more than a Common Tree Snake, which they say is ‘inoffensive’ and ‘bites infrequently.’
Um, I’m sorry, but how on earth a snake lying on a path hissing at you while you work your way into a cramped up frenzy trying to escape from it’s jaws is ‘inoffensive’ is beyond me!
Personally I found the whole experience to be quite offensive. F*&king F*&ked is also another term I may have thrown around after the event, followed by a FFS chaser.
Long story short, I was asked yesterday why stress is so prevelant in our lives and you know what my answer is/was? EXERCISE AND BLOODY NATURE.
Honestly, those two things just shouldn’t go together. Or possibly happen at all. Is it just me or was life a whole lot easier 20 years ago when your metabolism was at its peak and the only exercise you ever had to worry about was lifting yet another large glass of beer to your mouth?!
Ever seen a snake while doing a bit of light exercise? Or perhaps you have a better reason why exercise is bad for you? Either way, I’m all ears!
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